One of Hårass' many airplanes
- "Yes, Hårass got a bunch of airplanes in his backyard."

- "*silent*"

Bug Huntington
- " Why do people keep taking my candy?"

Archibald Slams
- " Young man over there, would you mind to happen to like magnets very much?"

- " Hey."

Ufer Crisp
- " Hey, I guess"

Piano Reeves
- " Imagine this. Seat belts. Not much, right? Thats. About. To. Change."

Midnight Rider
- " Well, if thou look into theses microscope, you're ought to see something reeaaally peculiar."

- "Yeah."

- "Hey, Shelf. Please use me responsibly. (click LEFT MOUSE BUTTON or TOUCH the screen)"

- "Hey, panda! I've read your book and it sucks!"

- "Hey!! Big Castle!"

- ""

- ""

- ""

- ""

Dr. Vanish
- "Just so you know... Dogert is best friends with an old portion of Döner kebab"

Bamse Lite
- "I'm flaming hot. Scalding hot. That's why I'm red."

- "I have a mission for you. Go to the Mountains of Shame, and wait until night falls."

Tristan Schultz
- ""

DingaDonga ChingaChonga Chikablow Kakadoo Bibakaw Aparatiff BebeKanga MemeManga Olsen
- ""

DJ Zanzibae
- "Enough of the chitchat. Let's fast-forward five years into the future."

Shelby Snake
- ""

- ""

Chikalong Tabing
- ""

Gamanto Hidayat
- ""

Moster Savage
- ""

- "Hey, I'm Hårass dad, Hårass! Nice to meet ya!"

George \"The Whisperer\" Rosenfeld
- ""

- "Hello, I'm making sure everyone are doing okay. No one should be sad in this place! You need a pillow to make your life more fluffy?"

Waldemar Aversione
- "I'm the leader in ape communication research."

- "No."

- "No."

- "No."

- "No."

- "A bitch sent me away, a bitch will drag me in."

Leafblower Dadason
- "they say i should cut my hair. that i should get a job. that i should leave my comfortable chair and get a proper education."

- "Oh my god, you're going to Mrs Superconductor, the best best best cat in the world?? Say hi from me!!"

Espen Knutsen
- "Mrs Superconductor? Yeah I've heard of her. She's cool. She got confidence AND looks. The whole package! Do you know if she's single?"

- "You're on a journey? To Mrs Superconductor? Oh, I envy your courage.. I would just freak out of star-struckedness... She's too hot to handle!!"

- "On your way to the magnet factory? Well.. Then all I can say is, good luck..."

Michael Catson
- "don't trust everything they say about that cat. she got her flaws, even if I, a HUGE fan, hate to admit it."

Aristoteles Fuckhard
- "Every time I go to the gym toilet, Adele is already there."

Rauserwelt Stonehenge
- "I'm about to read books and lift kettlebells. And I'm all out of books!"

Big Ridah
- "I love cats so much. When they purr... That's purre love."

- "Why do wives hate spontaneous unplanned roadtrips to the mountains on an indefinitive timespan with the boys? Because I love them!"

Baba Black (too controversial for the group)
- "I wonder where my old GameBoy Advance is. Last place I saw it was right at the border between Israel and Palestine."

Johnny Racer
- "Such a strong bridge! I can't believe how it can carry so many cars that it does?!"

Mary Cogarnagh
- "I like this place."

- "Of this, I have only one thing to say. Bridge."

- "I really like how high the bridge is."

- "I don't know what this situation is, so I'm just saying something to test how it feels to say something. Sausage"

Eric Laithwaite
- "It's just a bridge and nothing else! Move on, everbody, nothing to see here!"

Theodora Riverdale
- "The new bridge is much prettier than the old one, which I also drove over a couple of time, before it unfortunately got torned down by a ship."

Bamse Patreon
- "Did you know 30 people have died travelling across this bridge?"

- "Very nice, very nice bridge."

Nithilius Loret
- "Truly a beautiful bridge that has a safe place in my heart."

Harvey Aucaman
- "Fuck this bridge!!"

- "We had to cloze ze hotel. Too much gost"

Dixon Milano
- ""

Jorgen Wallenstam
- "It's actually not called Haftlan. It's called _Haftlan-Drakh_. Not as small of a difference as you could think!"

Council of Beavers - Councilor #1 - \"Cecil\"
- "Hello, animals in cars."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #2 - \"Jose\"
- "And I am Council #2!"

Council of Beavers - Councilor #3 - \"Arthur\"
- "Each one of the beavers has a group of 8 mentors assigned to it."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #4 - \"Heather\"
- "And every mentor has 8 advisors assigned to it."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #5 - \"Candice\"
- "And every advisor has 10 cookie houses assigned to it."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #6 - \"Cedric\"
- "A cookie house is just what it sounds like; A house with nothing but a single cookie in it."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #7 - \"Serenity\"
- "Our weekly execution is broadcasted on Japanese TV every thursday 9 o'clock."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #8 - \"Nicholas\"
- "But because we're so many beavers, it's hard to capture us all in the same shot. That's why you need an extra wide TV to watch the show."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #9 - \"LaShonda\"
- "Whenever the final decision is made, we all suck the juice out of a lemon each, and wash our teeth with a candy string."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #10 - \"Reneaye\"
- "Then we all smash the table in affect at the exact same time, and THAT'S when the gilloutin drops."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #11 - \"Eaves\"
- "Don't we get wet from the blood spill? Glad you asked. No, we don't, because we all stand behind a big wall of hardened glass."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #12 - \"Aénedor\"
- "Every week, there's a new beaver pushing the button. It gets the honor to put on the sexy black lace glove, to symbolize the important assignment, and then do the job."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #13 - \"Tinglyn\"
- "Shit, I forgot what I'm supposed to say."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #14 - \"Shanticia\"
- "And because of that, that's not needed anymore. I promise this would make sense if the beaver before me said his line."

Council of Beavers - Councilor #15 - \"Bertrand\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #16 - \"Nich�las\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #17 - \"Solomon\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #18 - \"Jewel\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #19 - \"Princess\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #20 - \"Lucian\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #21 - \"Hubert\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #22 - \"Jessie\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #23 - \"Alice\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #24 - \"Sylvester\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #25 - \"Shareen\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #26 - \"Constantin\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #27 - \"Melvin\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #28 - \"Hailee\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #29 - \"Cherry\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #30 - \"Savannah\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #31 - \"Lewis\"
- ""

Council of Beavers - Councilor #32 - \"Richard\"
- ""

The Mangler
- "I'm really in the mood for some pandcakes now."

Martin Ricky
- "Who are you, and what have you done to 'Epper?"

Bamse Premium
- "Right now, 5% of my weekly income goes straight into the new train budget!"

Child Boswald
- "How do you send money from Nigeria to Mexico? Just asking."

DJ Fizzt
- ""

The Neck
- ""

Kent Emerson
- "I chop wood. I mow lawns. I drive cars. Yes, I'm a DAD."

Bus Johnson
- "Did you know the song \"Bus Shaped Man\" by ZZ Top is about me?"

Benjamin Acosta
- "What do you think of my shirt?"

Benjamin Acosta
- "Look at my beautiful sculpture! I've made it myself!"

Stewart Lennart
- "Wanna scroll some social media on my brand new ultra-wide and mega-big cinema screen? 3D, of course."

Harpu Vitas
- "Welcome to DOGERTS.CAR.WASH! Pay 10 dollars, wash for 10 minutes!"

Roger Smith
- "You know what I want? A personal sheep that you can use for different errands indoors."

Steven Rockvelle
- "Here once lived the programmer and entrepreneur John Lowe."

Perhaps Wellingstone
- "Ah, the lovely past! When cars looked like a mix of trains and tractors and only nazis drove them."

- "You wanna see our BMX arena?"

- "maaaan i'm starving for pussy"

- "same"

Arctic Hare
- "I eat MEAT."

- "Magnetic leg-lengtheners really do the trick."

Bob Lester
- "Just standing here, watching the fire."

The Guardian of Life
- "Why is being stupid so frowned-upon?"

- "Hey!! Marry me!! I need a green card!!"

Annabelle Tinglyn
- "Wait a minute, I'm almost done!"

Balt Qwisney
- "Have you seen this epic video compilation of Tarantino being BRILLIANT in interviews??"

Morten Ollon
- "I'm ending my high-class attorney firm today."

- "I always bring a can of soda with me."

Ek Ollon
- "In 1989, I thought, there are way too few places to read about those fishes with a lamp-ball on their head."

- "A cow never forgets another cow's face."

\"The Vest\"
- "My name is Albert. But they call me \"The Vest\"."

Daniel Norstedt
- "Hey everyone! Whoa, we're gonna have so much fun today!"

Klint LaValle
- "Life is rough, man."

- "Wanna get vaccinated?!"

Mamma Mammson
- "Wanna get vaccinated?!"

Stefano DiPripedo
- "I'm sorry, but L'Amour De Pommes Frites is closed due to unpredicted circumstances."

- "Where's your 'pard, sir?"

Lil' Shit
- "Become fit an mindful with magnets! And you thought it wasn't possible? Think again!"

- "I don't have many years left. Just gonna stand here until it's all over."

Rumble Raz
- ""

- ""

- "I bought 25 houses. Yep, I own them all."

Rudolf Nissen
- "I'm married to Santa Claus!"

Nisse Rudolfsson
- "But we're thinking of divorce."

The 40 year old suspect
- "We're 40. We'll be fine."

His brother
- "We're 40. We'll be fine."

Horace Engdahl
- "Did you know, that I'm pretty well known in Sweden? *clears throat loudly*"

- ""

- "I'm Hårass!!"

- "Hårass!!"

- "Have you seen Mrs Superconductor? She's such a catanova..."

- "Meow meow"

- "There used to be lots of planes here. Because, you know, it's an airport!"

- "I don't think you should drive around in that car all day."

Mrs Superconductor's Nr. 1 Lover
- "I love that cat. She's always so nice and welcoming and enthusiastic and curious."

Stefano DiPripedo's mom
- "I've paused all my hobbies to focus 100% on magnet trains."

Unreasonably Sexy Math Teacher
- "Here's a little update for you. You're at story moment #" + (last_cut_before_talk) + "."

Baba Blue
- "Baba bobo. Baba baba baba baba. Baba baba bobo baba."

Baba Yellow
- "He got AIDS."

Baba Brown
- ""

Baba Purple
- ""

- "Hårass is really EXACTLY the same in person as his public image."

Enuf Widabolshit
- "You're at \"second\" " + (frame_counter) + " right now."

Slophsky Nut
- "I think I'll vote for the red cat in this year's election."

Lily Frogers
- "Someone has stolen our child! Why don't you do anything??"

Ted Salamanderson
- "Because I'm thinking of stuff."

- "Welcome to Haftlan's Souvenir Shop! Here's what we're selling today!"

- "H-hey, what are you doing? I've made all these myself!"

Space Vagina
- "\"Dark matter\" is short for \"Dark Gandalf doesn't matter\"."

Rumble Raz
- "Have you tried the position \"The Crow\"?"

John Lowe
- "Your files are pretty big, right? Like 3 megs? 5 gigs? Shit like that, bitch?"

- "Oh man, I'm so glad you're here! So, I met this girl, and it kinda worked out, and now I kind of have this baby and I can't just throw it away..."

Janet Spice
- "I've heard that Dark Gandalf is gay! Can you confirm the rumors?"

Janet Spice
- "I've heard your carclub is going down in FLAMES! Any comments?"

Janet Spice
- "I've heard that Dogert died! You have any juicy facts about it??"

Bamse Freemium
- "Don't tell the owner of the house that I live in this leaf pile."

Brutus Force

Martin Ricky
- "I just started living in the government's main building, to get the right vibe."

- "*you use BinocuLars and look far into the distance, both in space and time...*"

- "I was supposed to be in the car club, you know..."

- "Ding Dong Ding Dong I'm the police car"

Bitcoin Cowboy
- "One day Dogert woke up, in his bed, completely dead."

- "Polish Cow... Yeah, don't get me started."

George \"Sad\" Larsen
- "Hårass' friends are really weird."

- "*takes off headphones* Yeah, you wanted something?"

The Guardian of Life
- "Nature has a certain order."

- "I don't like being a waffle."

Unreasonably Sexy Math Teacher
- "*math sounds*"

- "I love red cats."

The Perfect Bathroom
- "My vision; A world full of toilets."

Mona Chefumbo
- "Drain the ocean! Flatten all mountains! Empty the sky of air!"

Disese Chefumbo
- "If you've tried to grab a milk package after eating potato chips, you know what true fear feels like."

Harald Svinulfsson
- "Bringing viking culture to the 21st century is hard. Especially the robbing and raping part."

- "Chicks rotate around me like an atmosphere."

- "Oh, hey."

- "Yeah."

- "I'm Saville."

Baby Yoda with a dadbod
- "Cows from Poland? Yeah, I'm in love with them."

- "I have no sense of humour. You can do anything and I WON'T laugh."

Babe McCowell
- "I have a hard time remembering what's left and right."

Michael Quiggly
- "Can you move a bit to the left? Me and my enormous log are trying to get through!"

Graham Fuckpissshit
- "The biggest tourist attraction in the area?"

Portsmouth Reykjadottir
- "Stuff has really changed here at the gym since last time!"

Olmo V. Acuum
- "I have only 4 wishes in life."

Orar Påkem
- "So, what brings you here?"

Kutan Abscess
- "is it easter yet??!"

Furunkel Karbunkel
- "please say it's easter soon!!"

Jesus G. Christ
- "we want it so bad!!"

Denise Abscess
- "Yuri's had to close."

Angela Karbunkel
- "What if someone kills TV\nWhat are we then gonna watch?"

Big Dude
- "Wanna party? "

Son Boswald
- "Isn't the weather a bit darker than usual nowadays?"

- "Come here! I'm gonna bitchslap you!"

Kay Bao
- "Wanna buy SCART cable?"

Janet Spice
- "I've heard that you're having crazy carchases with the police!"

- "Wait for it, I'm gonna say a swearword"

- "One time I took a picture of the place I was at."

- "HI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

- "Have you seen Beppe?!"


- "I'm also Hårass!! Fuck you!!"

- ""

Bamse Mortenson
- "Hi..."

- "hi..."

Roger Fuckpissshit
- "Hey, can you tell that motherfucker Adele that I'm way much cooler than him?"

- "How I would structure my start-up company? Vertically."

Brutus Ice

Oshikko Pantsu
- ""

Polish Wife
- ""

- "Today is the national 'Epper day!"

- "One of the reason I love 'Epper is the constant water leak in his kitchen."

- "Oh my god, 'Epper is so quirky."

- "Did you know that 'Epper has the world record for most epic wins in one day?"

- "When 'Epper is angry, he starts to punch people in the face."

- "My favorite 'Epper story is when he got drunk and let a wild dog into the church."

- "Are you also celebrating the national 'Epper day?"

- "When 'Epper lived in Denver, everyone thought he was insane."

- "'Epper! 'Epper! 'Epper!"

- "Hey!"

- "No."

- "Sure!"

- "Almighty 'Epper, let me fan you with my fan!"

- "No."

(background image by sachikomiliart)